Been there done that. Both sides, victim and cheater. Your essay is thorough and I applaud your examining the issue. I disagree with some of it, in that I believe almost no one is ready or mature enough for marriage unless they tried it at least once. We learn and grow together if we really want to be together with this person. But it will always be imperfect. All of us are human and fallible. Thanks for writing this. And don’t give up trying.