Photo by Artiom Vallat on Unsplash

They, Them

At dusk I went out the front door of the apartment building for my evening walk. Pausing in the entranceway I made conversation with another dog owner. Their dog is very friendly, a black Border Collie-mix. I stroked its head and let it lick my hand. Confiding that my dog is a stray and afraid of most other dogs, apologizing that she is not friendly, we stood and exchanged dog information.

This other person is tall and slender, rather like a man, with a pretty face and pretty voice. I think of them as them. But I don’t feel comfortable asking, “Say, should I call you they/them?” If someone looks obviously like a woman I don’t ask “Should I call you she/her?” Our society, as it advances down the long tortuous and tortured path from where we were to where we are going, may grow accustomed to using different pronouns. Some people have difficulty changing, adapting to the changes in how we relate to each other. We are all different. But if you cannot change, you are a Dinosaur.

I continued my evening walk down to one of the small lakes near where I live. Flocks of Canada Geese crowded each other for space as they circled to find a spot on the lake. They seem to sleep there, probably somewhat safe from the coyotes. In awe, I paused my regular pacing and watched them orbit, then slowly as they have practiced for thousands of years, descended towards the dark surface. Patches of dark water mirrored the dim…